How to show your love

Love in the sand

Life is a voyage of self-discovery and learning self-love is one of the main steps on that journey. To love ourselves is to know ourselves, but, after we love ourselves, how do we share our love with friends, family, and spouses? Even if we don’t get anything in return, showing our love is like giving a blessing to the people we cherish and adore.

Many years ago, I enjoyed a book by Gary Chapman called The Five Love Languages. And wow did that open my eyes to how people show their love! Gary believes people express and receive love in five different ways, called love languages: 

  • Quality time
  • Words of affirmation 
  • Gifts 
  • Acts of service 
  • Physical touch 

We all have our own love language—both for how we receive love and how we show it. When I discovered my love language, I then understood how to share my love and my relationships became more enriched. Do you know your own love language? If not, I recommend reading the book if you’re interested in finding out your own. 

Here are a few ideas on how to share your love.

Listen: 

People want to be seen and heard. To have a voice and, when they’re speaking, to have a receptive audience. When you listen to your friend or loved one, you make them feel seen and understood, accounted for, and accepted. Most of us could probably talk less and listen more. A wonderful gift you can give someone is your full presence. By being an active listener, you are showing your loved one that you are 

interested in how they feel.

Spend time together:

There’s no better way to show someone you love them than to spend uninterrupted quality time with them. It can be as simple as meeting a dear friend for coffee and getting caught up, or doing family traditions at the holidays. Some of my best memories with my husband is our quality time together. Like camping and being by the campfire, hiking in a vortex or picking out a new puppy. So many wonderful memories are created when you spend time together. 

Show appreciation:

Telling your friends and loved ones how much you appreciate them makes them feel valued and special. Sometimes, when someone has been in our life for a long time, we take their presence in our lives for granted, or just assume that the person knows how much they mean to us. To share your feeling of appreciation, you could tell them, but you could also try writing a note to express your gratitude for them. It may be easily overlooked, but a simple “thank you” goes a long way. Tell your loved one how much you appreciate them—it can be as simple as thanking them for just being them.  

Give gifts:

Some people feel most loved when they receive gifts. For these people, the gifts are not as important as the act of giving, which is an expression of love. Big or small, gifts say “I’m thinking of you.” The receiver sees them as an act of affirmation and love. Some of my favorite gifts are the hand-crafted gifts from a loved one. 


We all enjoy when someone in our life shows their appreciation for us. Your friends and loved ones deserve to experience that too. Don’t be afraid to show your love courageously. Show your love openly. Show your love with no strings attached. That’s when we get to experience true connections with our loved ones. So, enjoy sharing the love!