Accepting people where they are

I’ve had many life lessons throughout my life, and one of the big ones has always been “accepting” people where they are. It hasn’t always been an easy lesson to learn, but I’ve found it very powerful when I have embraced it.

When we don’t accept someone for where they are, we are in a place of judgment or trying to change them. Judgment creates resistance in our lives and in our relationships.  Resistance is like rowing against a strong current—it’s an exhausting state to be in. Some people spend their whole lives in this state. 

But the good news is—there’s another way. Lift the paddle up, and allow yourself to turn with the current of the stream. What acceptance does is resolve all judgment. It’s going with the flow. It says we’re willing to see this person in love and in the truth of who they are, without judging the path they’re on. After all, each one of us is on our own unique path. We’re all original in our own right; no two paths are alike. Who are we to judge? If we are so focused on judging someone else’s choices or way of life, we will never be fully present in our own lives. Our job is to walk our own path.

This can be a challenging subject when it comes to intimate relationships, family members, or dear friends.  

Acceptance doesn’t mean you let someone walk all over you. It doesn’t mean that you co-sign what someone is doing. It just means you allow them to be where they are and you don’t try to judge them or change them, even if we think we know better. 

Sometimes that means accepting someone and then moving on from the relationship with them. We can say, “I accept you and I honor you, but I can’t be a part of this.” You can love and accept someone and leave the relationship for your own well-being. That’s okay, as long as it comes from a place of love and acceptance.

So the next time you feel yourself judging someone, or attempting to change him or her, try grounding yourself in acceptance. Remember we’re all human and we all have struggles and we have to accept that others have them as well. As you begin to accept people for who they are, you’ll be releasing resistance and going with the flow. Be patient with yourself; it’s a process.  It does take time, but the benefits for your life and well-being are well worth the effort. for just that. Enjoy